Here's a list of just a few of the things I worry about.
1. White hair. Thanks Dad for your phenomenal, yet aging chromosomes.
2. Malapropisms. Am I pronouncing "automatically" as "automagically" or "insinuating" as "incinerating" and no one's telling me?
3. Parking. Maybe it's worth it to be an expectant or new mom for that sweet spot at the grocery store? Maybe not.
4. Favorite tree. I'm concerned it will fall on my house. Another note of gratitude to my father who planted that seed.
5. My funeral. I have outlined the important parts and how no one should sing about heaven or lighthouses. However, I'm confident the powersthatbe won't let my friend Joseph do the eulogy since he doesn't tuck in his shirt.
6. Dreams. Will I ever start my own business or write a book or land a triple axle?
7. Multitasking. Perhaps growing older will enable me to find an address while driving without having to turn down the radio.
8. Commute. Will I ever beat my fastest time of 19 minutes?
9. Habits. What happens on the day when I tug and no eyelashes are left?
10. Extra Virgin Olive Oil. I just know it's the delicious source of all our woes. It will probably lead to my funeral where I'll be in an open casket while someone sings "Beulah Gospel Train."
What worries you?
{image: FlowingData}
Hilarious! I can totally relate to #7 and #9. And I just can't stop doing #9!
ReplyDeleteI've been tempted a couple of times to invoke #3. Especially at the grocery store on a crowded Saturday.
ReplyDelete#'s 5 & 10 reminded me about something I've been meaning to ask you. Will you sing alto in a new group I'm starting at church? We're gonna call ourselves "The Golden Road Singers Family Quartet." Thanks to your suggestion, I think our first big hit will be "Beulah Gospel Train". I know you'll say yes, so I've already ordered your sequin covered dress. You're welcome.
ReplyDeleteMH: It's nice to find kindred spirits in the blogosphere :-)
ReplyDeleteKO: I would play that card constantly if it was up my sleeve. Or rather, under my shirt.
SS: Umm... I go to Church of the Highlands. What are you talking about?
#3. This would be the same as wishing one of your children were handicapped so you could park out front at Wal-Marts.
ReplyDelete#2. Not only would I tell you but I would remind you later.
#5. I am a good eugueligizer.
#8. Considering you are probably doing a lot of other things instead of driving I certainly hope not.
#9. You'll have to move on to your mustache.
#10. I've never understood the term "extra virgin". It seems as silly a use of adverb as "really dead".
J: Hateful and comical all wrapped in one cozy comment. Well done.
ReplyDelete