9.07.2011

The {Guest} Post About Making Lemonade Out of Infertility

Today's guest rabbit chaser is Lisa from While I Am Waiting. Here's the short list on Lisa:
1. She grew up in Alaska and would ice skate and sled during recess.
2. She moved to Alabama for college and now wears flip flops year round.
3. As a kid, she had a favorite blanket she'd dress up in baby doll clothes and jewelry.
4. She moved to Alabama for college and now this story seems less bizarre.
5. She's one of my top 5 favorite coworkers.

Lisa writes a poignant blog about the process of growing her family while navigating infertility, miscarriage and now adoption. I've never met anyone who's faced changes in a life's itinerary with as much grace and faith as Lisa. 

She could have shared something meaningful and life-changing in this guest post, but since that's not really what we do here...we'll with go embarrassing.
Infertility Products
I grew up in a conservative household and have been modest my whole life. I never talked about private or personal matters, but you would never guess it now.

You know what changed me? Infertility. 

It is full of all types of embarrassing situations you just have to laugh about. Dealing with infertility has led me to lose my “appropriateness” filters and sense of modesty. I laugh when women complain about going to their annual gynecologist appointment…are you kidding me? I had to pull down my pants for a million different doctors, nurses, and ultrasound techs…sometimes daily. Don’t complain about doing it once a year.

What else is embarrassing about dealing with infertility?

1. The sample room. It's a closet sized room housing a recliner (with sterile covering), a sink (with a basket of sample cups nearby), a light (with dimmer switch) and an optional basket of dirty magazines. It's where the man goes in to deposit his “sample” which could be for a semen analysis, intrauterine insemination (IUI) or other reasons. You have many opportunities to visit the sample room. Everyone knows what goes on in there. It’s in the middle of the doctor’s office. There is a sign on the door that says “quiet please” yet you hear every little thing going on outside the door. It’s sterile and probably the least romantic place you could imagine (except for the mood lighting). There is also the pressure to finish the job you're there to do. Once the weirdness of that is out of the way, you have to walk out with your sample and walk it down the hall in front of what seems like the whole world. The first time is mortifying, but after that it’s a piece of cake. You learn to be proud of your husband’s little swimmers. And maybe, just maybe you look at them under the microscope, videotape them and post the video on YouTube.

Not that we ever did that.

2. A doctor once told me I had beautiful cervical mucus. In the infertility world, this is a compliment and cause for celebration.

3. The questions you never thought you'd be asked.
  • How big are your follicles?
  • How high is your husband’s semen count?
  • How exactly does insemination work?
  • Have you tried standing on your head to help the sperm swim to where they need to go?
Embarrassing topics to talk about, but now I proudly share the specifics and take strange pleasure in seeing people’s faces turn bright red as I do so.

Cruel, maybe. Entertaining, definitely.

One guy once asked my husband if it wouldn't be better to keep a bucket at home in the freezer with “specimen" so when we had the insemination they could use a whole bucket instead of only a small sample given at the doctor’s office. Umm...thanks for the suggestion.

4. The refrigerator repairman once had to handle my refrigerated fertility medication that read “For Vaginal Use Only” in big letters on the box. My reaction? Blog about it.

That's just a small sample of the potentially embarrassing life of an infertile. Hopefully, I didn’t make you too uncomfortable as you read this post.

If I did, I'm bummed I didn’t get to see your face turn red.

What's happened in your life that you should be embarrassed about but you just aren’t?

Jamie's P.S. Don't forget to read and subscribe to Lisa's incredible blog. No regrets. Pinky swears. 

{image: Lisa Williams}

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