Maybe you had spinach from your omelet in your teeth while speaking to a crowd. Maybe you had chocolate smeared on your boob while talking to a coworker. Maybe you tried to get into your parked car when the actual owner of the car walked up. And the car wasn't even your make or model.
All of the above happened to me in the past week.
But let's get straight to today's tale of woe. I was at a meeting at a fancy schmancy bank representing my day job as we recruit supporters for United Way.
My performance was hailed by critics as a "freakin' fantastic job." Yes, that was written on a napkin and passed to me, but still... I was feeling good about my speech, my hair, my shoes. A quick trip to the ladies room and I'd be on my wonder woman way.
As I went to exit the restroom stall I had chosen, the lock wouldn't turn back.
No problem. I'll just turn harder.
No problem, I'll just turn harder and squeal a little.
After a moment of self-talk reassuring myself that I wouldn't actually be TRAPPED in the stall, I started to consider Plan B. And then I executed Plan B.
I listened carefully to determine if I was by myself, which I was. I quickly shoved my handbag under the door and listened again. Still alone. I concocted toilet seat protector gloves and crawled quickly under the door...mentally thanking God and my parents for 5'2".
Mere seconds from freedom and the restroom door opened. I looked up and my eyes met her eyes. HER EYES THAT COULD SEE ME AND MY SEAT COVER ETSY GLOVES ON THE FLOOR.
So...when you find yourself blushing in a moment you wish weren't happening...simply remember me on the bathroom floor.
In Other News...Reading Winners!
I promised e-books to 8 lucky folks in my most recent giveaway! And the rafflecopter-determined winners are...
#60 Erin Moon
#11 Katy McKay
#125 Sarah McDonnell
#66 Leigh Kramer
#21 Kristen Stewart
#139 Molly Gentry
#82 Darcy Odden
#134 Kari Rocka
Email me at email@example.com and let me know which of the 9 books featured here you'd like to me to buy for you :-)