2.02.2011

The Post About The Devastation of 35

Since the boy who almost left his shirt on my car bumper brought my blog back to life, I think it's fair to share what caused the temporary writing coronary.

I celebrated a birthday - November 5, 2010.


It was the best of times. Girlfriends and Italian food and big hair and presents. I can't wait to tell you about the presents.

It was also the worst of times. Thirty. Five.

A number that didn't sit well. It was like a plane that suffered some turbulence on the approach and then crash landed in the river. And not a Chelsy Sullenberger in sight to save it.

I felt sadness. And then more soul-crushing sadness. I couldn't pick out the guy in the lineup who had broken in and stolen my joy.
I suddenly sensed I'd been left behind. Friends were married with children. And not married for 2 years, but 10. Their children weren't toddlers, but pre-teens. I had friends who spoke 3 languages and owned businesses and operated on brains and had passports.

I tried to conjure a list of all the blessings in my life. But the only thing I saw on the paper was a chicken scratched directory of missing moments and failed attempts at progress.

Blech.

So writing about all the minor rabbits I still chased almost hourly seemed like placing a magnifying glass on all the major rabbits that were missing.

Blech. Part deux.

So I went radio silent. And not just with my writing, but with reading too.
Google Reader
This was my Google Reader as of this morning with more than FIVE THOUSAND unread posts. Como se dice "Holy Moly?"


I had forsaken my blog and any and all other blogs
.

But it's a new day. One God designed for me. How did He manage to pull me from the funk? Well, there was some head patting and then some nudging and then there was a guy named Peter who tried to cross the road in Toms.

"Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do My best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious - the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not the things to curse." Philippians 4:8 The Message

P.S. I've settled my debts with 35. She and I are going to try and learn to live together amicably until her uglier, ignorant cousin 36 moves in.

12 comments:

  1. I guess I'll read again since we are practically the same age.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Como se dice "Holy Moly?"

    I've found that "Madre de Dios!" works pretty well. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. J: You are MUCH older than me so don't comment crazy like that.

    N: Bueno!

    ReplyDelete
  4. 35 kicked my butt too. We'll have to talk about this.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I have missed your blog so, so much. Not as much as I miss you, of course, but still there was an empty spot on my online reading that made me sad. I had conjured up in my head the obvious reason for you being MIA on your blog - clearly you'd been picked up by a national online site that was looking for new and funny commentary and you were going to posting all of your rabbits there instead. You were just waiting for the contracts to get signed and then you were going to start posting for big $$$. In your own head, you may be 35 and missing some big fluffy rabbits that you desperately want, but in my head, you are the smartest writer that I know and the absolute best story teller, with an unmatched sense of humor. I hope that you catch your rabbits, but I doubt that they will deserve you once you do.

    ReplyDelete
  6. M: We shall gather over Thai food soon.

    J: Ugh - that was overwhelming. Seriously, so wonderful and kind and just what the rabbit ordered.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Dito to what Jen said. You are SO talented, SO gifted.... Maybe you have caught your rabbit and you just haven't realized it yet. As I approached 30 and saw all my friends getting married, I hit that wall you just hit at 35. Then I met this amazing woman (ten years my senior) who taught me that you don't have to be married to have a full and wonderful life! I was inspired by the way she celebrated the simple pleasures of everyday life, the way she found joy and contentment in little things that most people were too busy to notice. I see that same gift in you! I have missed your blog. You never fail to make me smile. That in itself is a pretty amazing gift.

    You may not own your own business or be opening up someone's brain, but please don't ever underestimate the value of what you do. My daughter and I are living testimonies to the fact that the work you do CHANGES LIVES!

    ReplyDelete
  8. LoLM: Stop it. I'm hugging you from here. Thank you Lori!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm glad you're blogging again. It's the right thing to do. But I'm sad that everyone thinks poor Chesley has a girl's name.

    ReplyDelete
  10. C: Even I wrote it as a girl's name. But I get a pass because I have a boy's name. All's fair.

    ReplyDelete
  11. 35 does sound rough, I personally wouldn't know, though. I do know about not focusing on things that are not noble or good or gracious. I am an expert at focusing on the ugly and not beauty. On cursing and not praising. Thanks Jamie.

    ReplyDelete
  12. That Satan is so crafty with his diversion tactics...

    ReplyDelete

Don't be afraid if I chase your rabbit comment...

 
Blogger Template By Designer Blogs