The Post About Beth Moore Thinking My Mom was a Drug Dealer

My last post was inspired by an article on Christianity Today "What Happens When We See Women Teach the Bible."

This piece made complete sense because of two women: Jan Golden and Beth Moore.

The former, my mother, has been an adult Sunday School teacher for as long as I can remember. Her Bible riddled with notes and lines highlighting scripture that resonates.

The latter has been a staple on my bookshelf since the 90s. The first book she published was the first I read: To Live is Christ. My long-suffering relationship with the apostle Paul (I'm Peter in every bumbling, brash way) was resolved with this detailed study.

These two women of God recently collided.

On Twitter, I follow both Beth Moore and her daughter, Amanda Jones. Therefore, I see their tweets to each other in my timeline.

This is a simple and sweet exchange. I replied.

This is a picture of my Mom's cell phone. She has to add minutes to it at a kiosk. It's untraceable by the FBI.

Beth, kindly replied.

YOU GUYS. She thought my mom was an actual drug dealer. It was the most magical moment I've ever had on Twitter. Including that time I had to win over Natalie Grant.

For the record, it's a Baptist church, so no good wine - just grapefruit juice.

My next move was to call my mother and read this exchange verbatim to her.

I did. It still includes a welcome window reading "Merry Christmas from Me" when she turns it on.

FOR EIGHT YEARS.

I'm so glad Jan and Beth met.

The Post About Learning to Teach, Lead and Speak

Marty was the youth minister at my church when I was a teen. He was kind and funny and invested his life in a group of rural kids who needed to understand how God could transform their lives.

He also taught us how to sell "toilet paper insurance" to raise money for missions. Families bought the policy and then we cleaned up their yard if it was TP'd at Halloween. If they didn't buy the policy, we rolled their yard.

Praise God.

In this group was a guy a few years older than me who we'll call Sam. Sam was confident, charismatic, and so very smart about the Bible.

Marty believed in growing up leaders within our group. Each year, he took extra time and resources to pour into a smaller group of students. This group would then lead small groups and teach other kids at retreats. It was no surprise he picked Sam, but it was a HUGE surprise he picked me.

As a young woman who had grown up in a fairly conservative Baptist church, the idea women could teach peers, much less lead groups was foreign to me. Being a part of this leadership group was exciting and empowering. 

Until it was time to take theory into practice.

As we prepped to go out and do and make disciples and pour into our own groups of people, Sam spoke up. 

He didn't think girls should be teaching. Or leading. Or even speaking in front of a crowd. 

The excitement and empowerment was exchanged for frustration and hurt.

Thankfully, Sam's wasn't the voice that lingered over me that day. Marty was speaking truth into our group. Truth for girls and for boys.

He talked about how leadership isn't determined by one's sex, but by one's capacity to do the job. God will send anyone who is obedient and prepared. Marty referenced women in scripture like Deborah, Esther, Miriam, Mary, Anna, and Phoebe. They weren't on the sidelines, but they were used powerfully by God to lead, to teach, and to speak.

Sam passionately disagreed. He said this should be a deal breaker.

I taught my first small group just a few days later. I've not stopped speaking since.

Who has been a Marty in your life?

This post was inspired by "What Happens When We See Women Teach the Bible."

The Post About Restless Rabbits: Week Three

Let's chat about what we've read this week. OR if you haven't read - there are still some great questions to discuss from chapter eight through thirteen of Restless by Jennie Allen. 

But first...our small group snack. My friend Elizabeth Hyndman posts her Friday Five each week and it's always full of goodness. This fella was stuck in the Las Vegas airport alone and made the most of his overnight stay with his iPhone rigged to a suitcase.


All by myself from Richard Dunn on Vimeo.

Now to our reading.

In these chapters, Jennie presents up "The Threads." She sets up the process of identifying the components of our story that mix and mingle to paint the picture of our purpose.

Here are questions to ponder. Answer as few or as many as you like in the comments.

What do you most hope to get out of the process of reading Restless?
Our IRL group shared many answers of what they were looking for:

• clarity
• focus
• reduced fear of change
• ability to get off the sideline

It can be difficult to step out to pursue our purpose because comfort will keep us content. Or at least that's true for me. For me, I'm looking to sit more at ease in this season of waiting. I'm not great at "at ease."

What would you do if you weren't afraid?
This is a question Sheryl Sandberg asks in her fantastic book "Lean In." My favorite discussion in our IRL group was how we often think of all the obstacles to living a dream - like finances, caring for parents, having young children. However, I must remember that thought process points straight to my arrogance to think I'm in control or that God won't care for the things I think only I can manage.

If I weren't afraid, I would write and train full time. That's as far as I've gotten because I don't know what to do to make that happen. To be continued...

Identify a highlight from each life stage when you felt pleasure in what you were doing. When were moments you remember being proud and satisfied. 
There are so many and I WOULD ADORE IT if you would share in the comments. For me, my first memory is being 5 years old in the community pool meeting Gretchen Davis for the first time. She said she would be in Mrs. Dodd's kindergarten class in the comings weeks and I was THRILLED because that was my assignment too. Feeling connected immediately made me feel less afraid. I now can see how I really enjoy meeting new people and making connections. It's also the foundation for my passion for social media - so many new people with whom to connect.

Now, get thee to the comments and share your answers and thoughts. Also, feel free to email me at jamiesrabbits @ gmail.com for some one-on-one.

This week's reading assignment: Chapters 14-18. 
We're still trekking through our Threads. Write down anything that wrecks you or confuses you and we'll chat it through on next week's post.

The Post About Restless Rabbits: Week Two

Let's chat about what we've read this week. OR if you haven't read - there are still some great questions to discuss from the first seven chapters of Restless by Jennie Allen. 

But first...our small group snack. I've been obsessed with super synced dancing since my friend Jen Clapp shared this treasure with me. 


Now to our reading.

In Part One, Jennie presents up "The Call." She sets up how we are called to dream, called to surrender, and called to run the race. It's a great introduction to what God has plotted out for us. 

Here are questions to ponder. Answer as few or as many as you like in the comments.

What was your favorite sentence or passage or idea in Part One?
My favorite sentence was on page 6: "I want you to dare to believe that God has a vision for how you are to spend your life." It's the paraphrase of John 10:10 when Jesus says "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." Our lives, our years, TODAY isn't just something to get through.

Can you know God's purpose? 
I'm going to answer this question with a question: How does God benefit...how is He glorified by hiding His will for us?

Do you know people who seem to be walking in God's purpose for their lives? What makes them different?
When I made my list of folks who seem to be camped out in God's will, a common thread appeared:  courage. Courage to speak or courage to act. Fear almost seems imperceptible in their lives. Although it's not the absence of fear, just the pushing through it to the other side, right?

Are you surrounded by dreamers in your life? 
I try to avoid friendships with those who bring drama. I crave those who balance thoughtful consideration with smiley emojis. When I told my friends I was quitting my job, they pondered and prayed and then high fived the decision. Because my closest friends are dreamers. Even my logical and bottom-line family members have wrapped most of their questions in encouragement.

When did you stop dreaming?
Another question answered with a question: Do you remember dreaming as a child and now those dreams seem long gone?

In Chapter 7, Jennie provides the running parable in which she shares four starting places. Where are you in the race?
A. Numb: Busy, surviving, somewhat content.
B. Thirsty: Not satisfied, don't know what to do about it.
C. Running Free: living it, feeling purpose, seeing God move.
D. At The Starting Line: don't really know God or have a personal relationship with him. Start here.

For me, I feel I'm running free. However, I also thought I signed up for a sprint and I'M ON MILE SEVENTEEN.

My favorite response to this from our IRL Restless meeting was: "My life is full, but it isn't really fulfilling."

Now, get thee to the comments and share your answers and thoughts. Also, feel free to email me at jamiesrabbits @ gmail.com for some one-on-one.

This week's reading assignment: Chapters 8-13. 
We're getting to the heart of the matter. Write down anything that punches you in the gut or furrows your brow and we'll chat it through on next week's post.

If you'd like to catch up and join us: Read the first chapter of Restless here and click "Look Inside."

The Post About Restless Rabbits: Week One

Let's read! 

Last night was week one of our IRL Highlands small group. We have a dozen folks sitting in my living room for the next six weeks tackling Restless by Jennie Allen. Restless explores the fact that God has called each of us to do great things, and then helps us discover what that might mean for each of us. 

Now, it's your turn.

As with any good gathering, online or not, we need to have a snack and introduce ourselves.

First, the snack.


I spent most of last week falling down a YouTube rabbit hole after searching for "Gender Reveals Gone Wrong." Heaven.

Now, for the introductions.

In the comments below, give us some of the same info we shared in our living room group.

• First Name
• Where You're From
• Why You're Interested in Reading Restless
• Share three facts about you, but two should be true and one should be a lie. I'll guess.

I'll go first.

This week's reading assignment: Part I: The Call. It's about 50 pages and it moves fast. Jot down things that strike you as fantastic, odd, or uncomfortable and we'll chat it through on next week's post.

If you're still not sure you want to join in: Read the first chapter of Restless here and click "Look Inside."

The Post About Working Out God's Story

Four days after God texted me to quit my job, I attended Storyline, a conference I'd registered for six months earlier. The event is intended to help folks create a life plan. I'm glad God knew I'd need a life plan six months before I did.

In Session Two, I wrote down three sentences that would haunt me AND anchor me for the season that was ahead.

1. Define one primary ambition. 

While I worked out my notice, I was asked to teach a class at my church that helps folks discover their personality, gifts, and purpose in life. Who better to use as an illustration than me? I spent an enormous amount of time asking friends what they thought my strengths were, looking at my passions and talents, and considering all the ways I found fulfillment. And I prayed.

In a few weeks, I realized my heart and skills and experience were the perfect match for an organization I was already connected to who had a huge need in the realm of social media. So I listened to "Oceans" by Hillsong United on repeat and submitted a proposal for a job that did not exist.

They read it, responded to it, and wheels began to turn. Slowly. It has become my one primary ambition. Whether it becomes my full-time, 401(k) job or I simply get to do it as a volunteer gig, I'm all in.

2. People-pleasing will kill your story.
At Storyline, John Richmond said "Don't measure yourself with the same ruler others use to measure you." I'm a recovering people pleaser. Quitting my job has sent me back to people pleasing rehab on almost a weekly basis. I want friends and family and even you to feel confident and reassured about the decision I've made. Especially in the waiting. I've considered jobs and moves that aren't remotely related to the one primary ambition simply to put people at ease.

This is when it's so important to have an inner circle who will root for you, pray for you, hold you accountable, and expect nothing from you but obedience to God. They're not afraid to ask hard questions and also not afraid of the sometimes weird, wonky answers.

3. Filter out even the good stuff.
Earlier this month, I was offered a dream job working for a dream boss. My days would be spent doing good work for good people. It was only two degrees off from my primary ambition.

The decision to say "no" was harder than almost anything I've ever done. Truly. When I spoke to the dream boss who wasn't to be, he said "My biggest fear wasn't that you would say no, but that you would say yes and in three months you'd be feeling nothing but regret."

THAT MADE ME WANT TO WORK FOR HIM EVEN MORE. Yet, it increased my confidence I had made the right call.

So I continue to wait. But actively wait.

Isaiah says it like this: "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint."

Running. Walking. Eagle Wing-ing.

I'm still all in.

The Post About Restless Small Group

Next week, I'm co-leading my first Highlands small group with my fantastic friend, Javacia Harris Bowser. 

We are spending six weeks tackling Restless by Jennie Allen.

Restless explores the fact that God has called each of us to do great things, and then helps us discover what that might mean for each of us. 

Jennie offers a simple process to identify the raw materials—the unique threads—we’ve been given by digging into five areas:

• Gifts
• Suffering
• Places
• People
• Passions

"We ache to be part of something great, and it makes us nervous at the same time. We were built for this, but we all fight hundreds of mixed motives and fears. Jesus said of us, "Whoever believes in Me...they will do even greater things than these." (John 14:12).....Our souls are restless until they rest in God. We were made for Him and He gave everything so that our souls could finally and forever rest in Him."

There are two ways you can be a part of this study.

1. Join us in person. 
Be a part of our IN REAL LIFE small group starting June 1. Just go to the Small Groups section of the Highlands website and search for "Restless." Space is limited.

2. Join us here on the blog. 
Each Monday, starting June 2, I'll be writing a discussion post and we'll chat through what we read the week before.

Read the first chapter of Restless here and clicking "Look Inside."

Have you ever felt restless?

The Post About Waiting Time

{image: She Reads Truth}

I've written 18 posts this month, but today I need you to write a post.

You see, I'm in this season of waiting.

I'm waiting for a long weekend. I'm waiting for the price of bacon to drop. I'm waiting for cooler temps. I'm waiting for my hair to grow. I'm waiting for the extra pounds to drop. I'm waiting for the job. I'm waiting for love.

Waiting.

It's not been a wasted season...not in the least. But a purposeful season of waiting can still be frustrating and lonely and difficult.

How have you navigated seasons of waiting in your life? 

Note: The image is from the current reading plan on Nehemiah from She Reads Truth. Fantastic daily study.

The Post About Hot Old Ladies Who Marry Their Cousins

One of my favorite books of the Bible is Genesis.

I like beginnings and guys who wrestle.

Whenever I read this book, some of the same questions always plague me:

1. What happened between the first and second verse of Chapter 1?
2. What did Eve think was happening while she was pregnant?
3. Who did Cain marry?
4. Who told Lamech he could have more than one wife?
5. What was Noah doing while he was naked that caused him to curse Ham for seeing it?
6. Was Ham mocked for having the name “Ham?”

Despite these questions, I've also learned some valuable lessons:

1. Women were considered very attractive into their 80's and later. This is why their husbands would pretend the women were their sisters. This prevented the "other" men who clearly couldn't control themselves around these hot mamas from killing the "man of the house." In reality, they weren't brother and sister - more like, half-brother and sister or cousins. That's so much better.

2. Babies were often named after something significant related to the circumstance of their birth. For example, Jacob (son of Isaac and Rebekah) has a name similar to the Hebrew word for "heel" because he was holding his twin brother's foot upon exiting the womb. If my parents had employed this method, I would have been named Melonheadia.

3. Stealing something from a family member never works out well. If you did attempt this, you needed to leave home immediately and only return when you could provide 100 sheep or a water well named in their honor as a peace offering. The exception to this rule was Rachel (wife to Jacob). She stole her father's household idols and hid them in her riding saddle. When he began the search, she apologized for not being able to rise from the camel because she was "in a woman way." It's good to know this special monthly arrival has been a go-to excuse for women for thousands of years. 

The most important lesson Genesis has taught me is that God is slow to anger when His children act like putzes. 

I'm a regular recipient of this mercy.

If you're a Bible reader, which stories are you drawn to the most?

The Post About My Failures At Feelings

When tragedy strikes, I may not be the person you want in your feelings bunker.

In the DISC personality profile, I'm a high "I." This means I:

• may be limited by being impulsive and disorganized and having lack of follow-through
• am described as convincing, magnetic, enthusiastic, and optimistic
• prioritize taking action, collaboration, and expressing enthusiasm

In the Enneagram profile I'm a high "7." My key motivations are:

• to maintain my freedom and happiness
• to avoid missing out on worthwhile experiences
• to keep myself excited and occupied
• to avoid and discharge pain

So when moments of sadness weigh heavy, my instinct is to treat it like a virus that must be contained.

I will nurse your sorrow with any number of medicines: laughter, optimism, carbs. Letting someone just sit with the heartache is difficult. I want to fix. I want to reframe. I want to be happy.

However, sometimes we need to wade in our grief. We need to let those we love leave the shore of bright sides and glasses half full and allow them to feel all the feelings.

Our job becomes being present and being willing. Willing to laugh, willing to be optimistic, and willing to eat cake - whatever's needed in being present.

There are so many examples in the book of Psalms of the writer starting out with raised fists and ending with open hands.

Chapter 13 is my favorite:

1 How long will you forget me, Lord? Forever? How long will you look the other way when I am in need? 2 How long must I be hiding daily anguish in my heart? How long shall my enemy have the upper hand? 3 Answer me, O Lord my God; give me light in my darkness lest I die. 4 Don’t let my enemies say, “We have conquered him!” Don’t let them gloat that I am down. 5 But I will always trust in you and in your mercy and shall rejoice in your salvation. 6 I will sing to the Lord because he has blessed me so richly.

I want to be the kind of friend who can sit beside someone as they point fingers in verses 1 through 4 and just let them point.

Then we can find our way to verses 5 and 6. Slowly, but surely.

How do you help folks through difficulty? 

{image: Jamie (depressing, huh?)}

The Post About The Rabbit Recommends: April-ish 2014

Each week or so I post things of which I'm fond. You can choose what happens after my recommendation. Ignore, embrace, debate. Earlier volumes of The Rabbit Recommends can be found here.

This month is an "-ish" because I didn't wrap up March. It's such a nice month with its...well...there's nothing too grand about March (unless you celebrate a birth) but I hate to ignore it completely. Like I do cleaning my freezer.

1. Facts That Sound Like Huge Lies. #1 will sell you on watching this entire clip.


2. How I Met Your Mother. I spent 104 hours of my life watching this sit-com. I know this exact figure because of the website tiii.me. 90% of the time, I loved it, but the finale pummeled me. No words. TV critic Alan Sepinwall summed up my feelings perfectly.

3. The Office Time Machine. This is a website that allows you to plug in any year and view a brief compilation video of every single time the TV show The Office made a reference to something that happened then. Here's one of my favorite years, 1994, as an appetizer. 


4. Vintage Easter Bunny. Buzzfeed collected 19 vintage Easter Bunny pics that will make your skin crawl. I could also show you three from my own Instagram feed.

5. Majestic. Kari Jobe released a live worship album recently. In finding the links for this list, I stopped to listen for the umpteenth time and stood up from my chair and sang like I was her twice.

6. Prince George on Tour. I didn't know seeing Prince George down under would wreck me so. But for 3 weeks, I was captivated. I mean, I want to touch her hair too. He's as cuddly as a kitten and here's proof.









7. Kids React to Walkmans. I'm old. You're old. We're all old.


8. Stephen Colbert. I'm a huge fan of The Colbert Report and the guy behind the character - Stephen Colbert. One of the reasons is how often he talks about his faith. Relevant Magazine recently shared 6 Times Stephen Colbert Got Serious About Faith.

9. The Rosie Project. I devoured this book in 6 hours last month. Don Tillman is a genetics professor who creates a detailed questionnaire to help him find a wife. She will be punctual, logical and most definitely not a barmaid, a smoker, a drinker, or a late-arriver. Yet Rosie Jarman is all these things. Funny and heartwarming.

10. Helen Keller. Although Helen Keller was deaf and blind, she wrote two particularly moving letters. One to the New York Symphony Orchestra after "hearing" Beethoven's 9th and one to Dr. John Finley after "seeing" the view from the Empire State Building. We're all underachievers.

11. The Most Famous Book Set in Each State. Mental Floss compiled a list of all of the best-selling book sets in each state. My home state of Alabama, thankfully, picked To Kill a Mockingbird rather than a biography of Bear Bryant. My heart goes out to Arkansas.

12. Bitman Begins. My theory is there can never be enough Hemsworths. My favorite two gathered for this newest film adaptation.  


13. Jen Hatmaker. I discovered Jen Hatmaker shortly after she published 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess and I liked her almost immediately. Someone who had faith AND a sense of humor. A combination that is all too rare in my opinion. She wrote two blog posts recently that inspired me: Run Your Race and Where I Stand. 

What have you loved recently? What are your recs for books, movies, TV, websites, articles or cat videos?

The Post About More Than Raising Awareness

Last month, people across the Internet drew a red X on their hands to shine a light on the continued existence of slavery across the globe. A good thing.

As someone who's worked in nonprofits for a long time, I know the value of those events considered "friendraisers." We always need folks in the know about the causes we care about. 

However, the next steps are the meat of the matter to agents of change. Finding ways to prompt people to care in word AND deed. Nicole wrote about those who never make it past the red X in this thought provoking post about slacktivism. 

Sex trafficking — the forced prostitution of women and girls — is a billion-dollar industry. It's not just in brothels in Taiwanese back alleys (my initial vision of it.) It's happening in America. It's happening in Birmingham.

That brings me to my friend and blogger, Rachel Callahan, who's decided to go beyond the red X.

Rachel is putting hands and feet to her support of this cause by launching Picture Birmingham, a site to sell her images of the Magic City and other great places with all proceeds going to support The WellHouse. The WellHouse is a faith-based organization offering immediate shelter and transitional housing to women who have been trafficked, are prostituting, or otherwise sexually exploited.

And the photographs are stupid good.

My first order from the site was this set of notecards. Gorgeous.

I wanted to do more than just spend all my stay-at-home-Jamie money so I contributed one photo of my own of this snazzy city. 

This was a particularly dark time in my life because I ran my first 5K at Sloss Furnaces. I won't be doing that again.

You can snag a print or canvas of my photo and dozens more at Picture Birmingham and go beyond the red X. Also consider liking PB on Facebook or following Rachel on Twitter.

RABBIT BONUS: If you use the code "rabbits" at Picture Birmingham, then you get 11% off any purchase through March 31. 

Disclaimer: I don't get any kickback for this post, except Rachel's kids might like me more than they do now. 

{images: Picture Birmingham and Jamie}

The Post About Waiting Not So Patiently

Do you write a to-do list each day or week?

As an ADD survivor, I've never been that ambitious. I tend to have lists that focus on the next hour. And there's bargaining even in that short bullet list. "Jamie, if you reply to email for 45 minutes then you can watch 15 minutes of cat videos."

Since I'm still a Stay-At-Home-Jamie, my life looks different. Being unemployed has added all these hours to my day. Some are spent being productive doing freelance work or volunteering or spending time with neglected family and friends.

But some of those hours are spent very aware of feelings I've ignored. The loudest is anxiety.

While I was working full-time, I just plowed ahead through long work weeks trying to be more than my job description required. I'm a recovering people-pleaser who struggles with "no" and generally nods in agreement and then competes to be the best, fastest, and most. But all the "yes" often lands people pleasers somewhere between mediocre and burned out.  

The end of almost every day of the past every year has been spent racking my brain for the task I forgot or the person I overlooked or the project that needs one last moment of attention.

That anxiety lingers even now, almost three months later. I have to remind myself, often out loud, that I don't have a job. There's nowhere to be. There's no schedule. This immediately births a more paralyzing stress - I must find a job. I must talk to people who can help me find a job. I must learn to answer questions people ask about me finding a job.

Job, job, job.

God prompted this storyline, so I've been waiting on Him to wrap up the cliffhanger. Waiting not-so-patiently.

This past week, the patience had been more difficult to access. Of course, God sent me messages in response.

I stumbled on this quote:
"Most times, the waiting really isn’t about the waiting, it’s about becoming." Lindsee Eddy

Then I stumbled on this passage in Isaiah:
Why would you ever complain or whine, saying,
“God has lost track of me.
He doesn’t care what happens to me?”
Don’t you know anything? Haven’t you been listening?
God doesn’t come and go. God lasts.
He’s Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn’t get tired out, doesn’t pause to catch his breath.
And he knows everything, inside and out.
He energizes those who get tired,
gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out,
young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.

And no surprise, God text messaged me through a friend on Tuesday who didn't know how toxic my anxiety was becoming:
"Last night I was in my kitchen asking God like why oh why are you making her wait??? Come on now!? (I was a little ticked, lol!) and I clearly heard him say, 'I'm not making her wait. I'm letting her rest. This is my holy rest, my gift!' A season of rest is right and fitting. It's his gift to you, preparing you for his next."

So I don't have to rush or be anxious. I can rest. There's no task or person or project or job that matters more than now.

Focus on the becoming, not the waiting. Rinse and repeat.

What are you anxious about? Do you struggle in the waiting?  What's your "cat video reward" for accomplishing tasks?

The Post About Being a Work of Art

One of my favorite sentences in the Bible is found at the beginning of Ephesians 2:10.

"For we are God's masterpiece."

That's who I am. That's who you are. We are works of art.

And not like art you make at camp or at Sips-n-Strokes or in Introduction to Pottery. We are Chihuly glass and Adams photographs and Van Gogh canvases. We're not hung on just any refrigerator. We grace the fridge doors of the Creator of the Universe.

But there's a dilemma.

That's not how I see myself. I let other things define me. My hobbies, my skills, my relationships, my experiences, my titles.

I am a Writer. Marketer. Daughter. Sister. Aunt. Godmother. Friend. Baker. Volunteer. Fan.

I am Single. Childless. 

However, these titles aren't really who I am. I am a masterpiece. He said so.

But are masterpieces sporadic writers? Are they bakers who leave messes in the kitchen? Are they unmarried? Are they marketers without jobs?

This chasm between what I think I am and what I really am has never been more difficult to cross than now. Unemployed me couldn't possibly be a treasured piece? What am I without to-do lists and deadlines and an organizational email address?

I am enough.

Thankfully God is prone to repeat Himself. Not because He forgets, but because we do.

Psalm 139:13-14

For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 
 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.

It's important to remember this was written by David. A guy who was a polygamist, murderer, adulterer, and pretty crappy father. Yet he didn't let those titles define him. He knew he was a work of art. He knew it full well.

Let us know it full well too.

{image: Jamie}

The Post About Love and Sex at Church

I know many of you embrace January as a chance to focus on healthier relationships. I am among you as I try to improve my relationships with my neighbors and cheese.

Not enough time with one, too much with the other.

Perhaps you're thinking more about working on your romantic relationship. I would like to work on ANY romantic relationship in 2014.

Enter Stage Right: My Pastor.

This past year, my church had a series on The Song of Solomon called Love Story.

I fancy a sermon series that tackles a book of the Bible chapter by chapter AND proves to be invaluable in the daily.

Week 1: The Art of Attraction.
"The first focus of attraction should be spiritual." I have some work to do in this area. I'm also working through the fact that Bradley Cooper and I may not end up together because of this.

Week 2: A Season for Everything. 
"Don't focus on finding the right person. Focus on becoming the right person." Ugh. And guess what? The reward for being the right person may not be Chris Hemsworth or another fella with Disney prince forearms. It may just be being a right person.

Week 3: Great Sex.
Yep. We talked about coitus. But God's way. Which made my face turn red so it's not what you expect.

Week 4: Trouble in Paradise.
Is it possible to fight well in a relationship? Solomon shows us how. 

Week 5: Deeper Love.
My parents have been married almost 44 years. I'm all about it.

Week 6: Till Death Do Us Part.
This was the toughest week for most couples according to my scientifically sound survey of 9 people.

Each of these links lets you watch the video or listen to the audio and download those files as well. It's free.

What's your best tip for finding romance or growing romance or simply keeping it alive?

The Post About My One Word for 2014

Hi. I've missed you. I'm back. There you go.

It's become common practice for folks to choose one word to serve as an umbrella for the coming year. There's even a website: One Word 365. They encourage you to choose...

One word that sums up who you want to be or how you want to live. One word that you can focus on every day, all year long.

I did this in 2012 when I chose "peace." It was the right call. My life can often be chaotic and harried and swirling. And that's just inside my own head.

Last year, I chose "leap." And boy did I do some leaping. I took trips with people I met on the Internet. I started podcasts with people I met on the Internet. I fell hard for a fella I met on the Internet. I soft launched a cake pop business and quickly shut it down. I joined a new church. I quit my job.

Some of these jumps landed soft on a cloud and some landed solid on the concrete. But I leapt.

This year, I've chosen the only thing that makes sense to me.

Waffle.

Merriam-Webster has two definitions for "waffle:"

: to be unable or unwilling to make a clear decision about what to do

: to talk or write a lot without saying anything important or interesting

But I'm willing to make lots of decisions about things in 2014. I've already decided to keep Spotify over Next Issue while living on a tight budget. I've decided to love Sherlock and Watson equally. I've decided to listen to One Direction without apology.

I also plan to talk and write a lot this year, but hopefully the outcome will be important and/or interesting. And I'll probably reference the previously mentioned One Direction. Seriously, Midnight Memories is a solid album.

When I chose "waffle," I meant this:

2014 will be about waffles. That means choosing to wake up and take time to mix the flour, buttermilk, vanilla, eggs, sugar, and salt and sit down to the best recipe of waffles I've found. It means quality over the convenience of Leggo'ing my Eggo.

This isn't only about ingredients in a bowl. It's about stopping to relish experience. It's about being still. That's something this ADD survivor doesn't have listed under "additional skills."

For most of my life, I've been in such a hurry to meet the next person, to start the next project, to Instagram the next moment. It's been exhausting. It's time to be still. Even the Creator of the Universe is on board with "waffle."

Psalm 46:10 says "Be still, and know that I am God..." The NASB version of the Bible exchanges "be still" for "cease striving."



I'm going to try to stop striving in 2014. And eat more waffles.

What are you plotting and scheming for this next year? Next month? Next meal?

{images: Jamie}

The Post About Finding A Church Like Finding Love On The Bachelor

In May 2012, God prompted me to leave a church I loved. I had been active and involved in leadership for more than 12 years, but He said, "That's enough. You're done here."

Previously, I shared how I tried to ignore God and carry on and how that didn't work.

Reluctantly, I took the leap of faith God had whispered, then chanted, then billboarded and began the task of finding a new church.

I did not take this search lightly because I know the value of the local church in my life. Some of you have possibly experienced great hurt in the sanctuaries that should be rooms of restoration. Perhaps the church is a source of pain rather than healing.

However, for me, the local church has always been a source of joy and rest and relationships that matter. Don't get me wrong, there have been CUH-RAZIES in those fellowship halls and Sunday school classrooms. But for the most part...life-giving.

Being separated from the local church for a season, even by choice, birthed an anxiety in me. Since I'm not a fan of worry or waiting, I put the pedal to the metal. Over the course of seven months, I visited 11 churches in the metro Birmingham area and narrowed it down to three and then to one. What did this process look like?

It looked just like The Bachelor. An eligible person and a pool of romantic interests. There were connections, conflicts, and dramatic twists. There were eliminations and a final rose. 

The Steps To Finding Love

1. Make A List of Qualities You're Looking For: I've always preferred to date folks who are emotionally healthy (LIKE ME) so I thought the same should be true for my church. What makes a healthy church? Charles Stanley provides a few characteristics I used in my search.

• Bible-centered: Not events-centered, not works-centered, not pastor-centered, not casserole-centered. As much as I might fancy that last one.
• Spiritual: This is such a wonky overused term, but in this case it means an emphasis on a personal relationship with God. No middle man.
• Evangelistic: It's crucial when a hungry person finds bread that he tell other starving folks where he got it. A healthy church has structure for doing this. Bonus? If they have actual bread in the form of breakfast pastries.
• Influential: A church should be impacting its community for good. That impact should be obvious and measurable.
• Financially Sound: I left a church that loved God so profoundly but was strangled by debt. It should manage their money better than me (ex. still paying for that handbag I bought in 2009.)
• Friendly: Let's not pretend all churches are packed to the brim with kindness. There's a reason it was easy not to visit some places on my list a second time. SMILE AT ME GREETER PERSON.
• Growing: This isn't just about numbers. But that doesn't hurt. It's also about members growing in their faith, their heart for others, and ability to transform the big and small world around them.

2. Play The Field: I needed to go on lots of dates. I wanted to learn as much as possible about a church and one visit wasn't always enough. Plus, it's important to take time to compare and contrast so you don't get swept up by free coffee and cushy seats.

3. Ask God for a Spouse: If ABC spent more time encouraging their contestants to pray about the roses they're passing out, then I'm sure we'd have more actual happily ever afters. Every time I visited a church or its website or emailed a staff member, I prayed. God wants us in the place He wants us. He has no interest in hiding that tidbit of information from us.

4. Make a Commitment: Beyonce is right. You need to put a ring on it. The idea of living out your faith on your own is not enough. The accountability and responsibility to the people of God found in the local church is such a snazzy thing.

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10:23-25

I'm about to celebrate my one year anniversary with my "final rose" church. Chris Harrison could not have narrated a better ending.

Have you ever tried finding a new church? Finding a new love? What are your tips for both?

{image: Jamie}

The Post About God Telling Me To Quit My Job

God is good. God is great. God is aggravating.

Let me explain.

This summer I took a sabbatical to the Carolinas. Five days intended to focus on God and ponder how He designed me to impact the world.

I forgot God designed me as an extrovert who finds restoration and solace in the presence of people. So wandering alone in the Blue Ridge mountains left me crying over complimentary waffles at a Holiday Inn on Day 3.

Sabbatical over.

But the pursuit of God was not. I went home to my cozy Birmingham and dug into the process:
1. Study the Bible.
2. Read spiritual resources.
3. Seek Godly counsel.
4. Talk to God out loud in my living room.

I started in Genesis. There is no better place to start than the beginning. Plus, Genesis is where we learn that road trips with Jesus always take longer. I camped out in 50 chapters filled with obedience, rebellion and a Creator's commitment to always do what He says He'll do.

God told me to quit my job. 

I heard it in passages like Genesis 12 when God tells Abram to leave and go. I read it when God asked Abraham to lay down the very thing that defined him in Genesis 22.

Next, I read four books with a bent for stepping out in faith. I listened closely to Jen Hatmaker as she made room in her life for obedience and generosity. I highlighted all the sentences Chris Hodges used to explain the difference between having to serve God and getting to serve God. I reread Mark Buchanan's powerful exploration of how Jonah (and Jamie) live in a wonderless borderland. Finally, I wrote Bob Goff's words on my heart:

“Every day God invites us on the same kind of adventure. It's not a trip where He sends us a rigid itinerary, He simply invites us. God asks what it is He's made us to love, what it is that captures our attention, what feeds that deep indescribable need of our souls to experience the richness of the world He made. And then, leaning over us, He whispers, "Let's go do that together.”

God told me to quit my job.

I camped out with Godly people in two different weekly small group meetings. Old and new friends shared story after story of God miraculously providing in circumstances that would challenge the greatest of cynics. Rabbit Sidebar: I'm a ROCK STAR cynic.

God told me to quit my job. 

Throughout each of these steps, I found myself back on my loveseat in my living room in my house telling God what-for.

Me: Why would you want me to quit my job? I love my job and the people at my job and the snacks at my job.
God: {patiently listening}


Me: Who's going to pay my mortgage? Bank of America does not accept side hugs as payment.
God: {patiently listening}


Me: What kind of job will I get? I haven't updated my resume since 2006.
God: {patiently listening}


Then on a Monday night at 9:20pm, I put my foot down.


Me: YOU CAN'T ASK THIS OF ME. I'M NOT BRAVE LIKE BRAVE PEOPLE ARE BRAVE. 

And then my phone buzzed. This random text arrived from a friend at 9:22pm:

"Hey! I was reading in Deuteronomy 1 and Moses is reminding the Israelites of their disobedience due to fear and not trusting God. I don't know what God is speaking to you but thought of you when I read this and our need to be obedient when the instruction is clear."

God told me to quit my job.

On Thursday, that's just what I did.

Why does God want me to quit my job? Who's going to pay my mortgage? What kind of job will I get?

I don't know the answers to these questions. I only know that God and I will do it together.

God is aggravating, but He is also good and He is great.

The Post About How To Fight Right With a Celebrity on Twitter

So I mentioned in my last post about attending this conference with these friends and hearing this speaker and buying this book.

The book, Dare To Be, has been a tool for God to be ALL UP IN MY BIDNESS.

The co-writers Charlotte Gambill and Natalie Grant do a fantastic job of inspiring a reader to be more, do more and live more. This is something John wrote about and something I want to be about.

In the meanwhile, I wander around the Internet and bump into 19 Genius Improvements To Everyday Products and this article.

Read full article...

Yes, that's the same Natalie Grant who cowrote the super duper devotional I'm reading. This leads me to a conundrum and a tweet.
 

Of course, someone whose bio includes "ADD survivor" should always be taken with a grain of salt. But if you're Ms. Grant wandering around the internet and bumping into a tweet about you then you might find yourself in a conundrum. 

Honestly, I was all goose bumpy arms and fidgety fingers when this reply popped up in my feed. You see, in my world, Natalie Grant is famous. Even if you've never heard of her, she has 189,000 followers on Twitter. That's well-known.

But I'm a firm believer you can't say something about someone without being prepared to answer for it when confronted.

So I answered for it.

I assume Natalie is now a rabbits subscriber. HI NAT! YOUR HAIR IS PRETTY.

There's a lesson in here for all of us who may encounter strangers who may not like us. When someone doesn't know you, you can't hang your hat on their opinions of you.

 

I meant this. I will watch the pilot. Sometimes things you think will be ridiculous like a show about dead people who shuffle around Georgia trying to eat not-dead people is FANFREAKINTASTIC.

  

And THAT my friends is how you get someone who didn't like you to like you in less than a dozen tweets.

Also, Twitter is a horrible place to have a discussion about anything. So let's not.

Thoughts? Concerns? Comments on Twitter debates?