6.17.2010

The Post About My Mom Not Coming Out of The Closet

Jack's
My mom is as pure as the driven snow.


Have you heard that saying before?


It simply means she's kind and gentle and long suffering and nurtures with food.


All things I don't deserve.


She called this morning and offered to bring by an extra sausage biscuit on her way to her job at my church. I never turn down free food - a lesson she taught me - and I met her on the porch.


Here is a transcript of our conversation:


Me:
You look pretty in your purple shirt.


Mom:
I was concerned about wearing it because at my high school you weren't supposed to wear purple on Thursdays.


Me:
Why?


Mom:
I never really knew, but once a girl told me it meant you were...


Me:
What?


Mom:
(whispering) It meant you were gay.


Me:
Well, I'd stand confident in your sexuality today and wear it with pride. But don't kiss Ms. Ruth, the financial secretary, on the mouth.


{image: Jamie}

6 comments:

  1. Does your mom appreciate your quick wit?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Does your mom appreciate your rapist wit?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yes, Your mom does appreciate your wit - mostly because you got it from me. Also, Joseph, I think the term is rapier wit. Love, Mom

    ReplyDelete
  4. A: As you can see on comment #3 - yes.

    J: I should have a screener for your comments.

    Mom: {hugs}

    ReplyDelete
  5. I thought it was green.
    But then, I went to a high school whose mascot was a Brownie!

    ReplyDelete
  6. D: Everyone at your high school will eventually come out. Be prepared.

    ReplyDelete

Don't be afraid if I chase your rabbit comment...

 
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