The Post About What Happens At The Party

Jamie's Rabbits is a safe place. It's just you and me here so let's confess.

What's the strangest thing that's ever happened to you at a party? 

This happened to me tonight.

As the photographer and my friend Stephanie Parker said "It's not a party until you start measuring head size."

The Post About A Song for Graduates

There's a lot of advice out there for graduates.

A few of my favorite recent speeches were given by Mindy Kaling at Harvard and Rainn Wilson at USC.

However, there's something missing at these graduation ceremonies...a great class song. Not an alma mater, but an actual song that some trio of capped and gowned graduates sings in harmony to canned music over bad speakers.

When I graduated high school, my classmates chose a song written a decade earlier. Not a classic ode to change or hope or wisdom.

They chose The Theme from St. Elmo's Fire.

THE LOVE THEME.



That's not all. There were lyrics for our capped and gowned singers.

We laughed until we had to cry
And we loved right down to our last goodbye
We were the best I think we'll ever be
Just you and me
For just a moment
We chased that dream we never found
And sometimes we let one another down
BUT THE LOVE WE MADE
Made everything alright
We shone so bright
For just a moment

YOU GUYS?!?!

I respectfully request a do-over. I nominate and unanimously choose "What'd I Say" by Ray Charles.



This song was originally composed at the end of a concert in 1958 when Charles and his orchestra had 12 minutes left to fill. Both the lyrics and music were entirely improvised on the spot.

Life Lesson #1: Sometimes your best work will happen when you throw out the business plan and the marketing strategy and just do it.

Charles doesn't begin singing until a minute and 30 seconds have passed.

Life Lesson #2: Be slow to speak, and quick to listen.

The song is almost seven minutes long. Most songs played on the radio at the time were two and a half minutes. Radio and record executives balked at the length but Charles stood by every second.

Life Lesson #3: What you create or your choices won't always make sense. That's okay.

Billboard magazine initially gave "What'd I Say" a tepid review: "He shouts out in percussive style ... Side two is the same." Charles' label, Atlantic Records, pushed the single despite a lack of critical acclaim. Within weeks, the track topped out at number one on Billboard's R&B singles chart, number six on the Billboard Hot 100, and it became Charles' first gold record.

Life Lesson #4: Not everyone will be on your team, but the ones who matter will be.

While the Beatles were developing their sound in Germany, they played "What'd I Say" at every show. When Mick Jagger sang for the first time with the band that would become the Rolling Stones, he performed a duet of "What'd I Say." The Animals, Steve Winwood, the Beach Boys, and Van Morrison counted the song as a major influence on why they were interested in music. It's been covered by Elvis Presley, Eric Clapton, Sammy Davis, Jr., Jimi Hendrix, Roy Orbison, Johnny Cash, Garth Brooks, Willie Nelson, Billy Joel, Etta James  and Alvin and the Chipmunks.

Life Lesson #5: Leave a legacy.

What was your class song? What would you add to a graduate's playlist?

The Post About Working Out God's Story

Four days after God texted me to quit my job, I attended Storyline, a conference I'd registered for six months earlier. The event is intended to help folks create a life plan. I'm glad God knew I'd need a life plan six months before I did.

In Session Two, I wrote down three sentences that would haunt me AND anchor me for the season that was ahead.

1. Define one primary ambition. 

While I worked out my notice, I was asked to teach a class at my church that helps folks discover their personality, gifts, and purpose in life. Who better to use as an illustration than me? I spent an enormous amount of time asking friends what they thought my strengths were, looking at my passions and talents, and considering all the ways I found fulfillment. And I prayed.

In a few weeks, I realized my heart and skills and experience were the perfect match for an organization I was already connected to who had a huge need in the realm of social media. So I listened to "Oceans" by Hillsong United on repeat and submitted a proposal for a job that did not exist.

They read it, responded to it, and wheels began to turn. Slowly. It has become my one primary ambition. Whether it becomes my full-time, 401(k) job or I simply get to do it as a volunteer gig, I'm all in.

2. People-pleasing will kill your story.
At Storyline, John Richmond said "Don't measure yourself with the same ruler others use to measure you." I'm a recovering people pleaser. Quitting my job has sent me back to people pleasing rehab on almost a weekly basis. I want friends and family and even you to feel confident and reassured about the decision I've made. Especially in the waiting. I've considered jobs and moves that aren't remotely related to the one primary ambition simply to put people at ease.

This is when it's so important to have an inner circle who will root for you, pray for you, hold you accountable, and expect nothing from you but obedience to God. They're not afraid to ask hard questions and also not afraid of the sometimes weird, wonky answers.

3. Filter out even the good stuff.
Earlier this month, I was offered a dream job working for a dream boss. My days would be spent doing good work for good people. It was only two degrees off from my primary ambition.

The decision to say "no" was harder than almost anything I've ever done. Truly. When I spoke to the dream boss who wasn't to be, he said "My biggest fear wasn't that you would say no, but that you would say yes and in three months you'd be feeling nothing but regret."

THAT MADE ME WANT TO WORK FOR HIM EVEN MORE. Yet, it increased my confidence I had made the right call.

So I continue to wait. But actively wait.

Isaiah says it like this: "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint."

Running. Walking. Eagle Wing-ing.

I'm still all in.

The Post About The Summertime Musical Popcast

Previously...
I host a podcast with Knox McCoy called The Popcast. It is the Brad Pitt of podcasts: solid, dependable, hard-working and charmingly humorous. More specifically, The Popcast is a weekly argument / conversation about all things pop culture.

In this week's episode (#40), it's a musicpalooza.

We answer questions like:

• Who will own the summer music scene?
• What are the all-time favorite summer songs?
• Why do we listen to the specific music we listen to?
• If Miley Cyrus never existed, who would have taken her place?

Click to listen to Episode #40.

What's a perfect song for summer?

This is our Popcast Summertime collaborative playlist. Add your favorites!

The Post About TV Shows To Binge This Summer

Summer is for poolsides and baseball and beaches and sunshine and flip flops.

All of these things are fairly overrated.

Instead of going outside, why not stay in your pajamas and TV binge?

Here are 12 shows I really loved that you should consider adding to your watching wish list.

Drama

• Firefly (14 episodes): Nathan Fillion partners with creator Joss Whedon of Buffy and Avengers fame to create this fantastic sci-fi western. Episode #8 "Out of Gas" is one of my favorite hours of television. Ever. (Amazon Prime / Hulu Plus / Netflix)
• Orphan Black (10 episodes in Season 1): My podcast partner, Knox, demanded I watch this show and I finally did. Holy moly. A character-driven sci-fi show with the amazing Tatiana Maslany playing most of the parts and killing it. (Amazon Prime)
• Sherlock (6 episodes in Seasons 1-2): This contemporary adaptation has teamed Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman for truly some of the best TV out there. Episode #4 "A Scandal in Belgravia" could be its own feature film. (Netflix)
• Luther (10 episodes in Seasons 1-2): I have my friend Erin Moon to thank for introducing me to the actor Idris Elba. Luther is psychological crime drama at its best. (Amazon Prime / Hulu Plus / Netflix)

Comedy

• Brooklyn Nine-Nine (22 episodes in Season 1): Andy Samberg got all the praise for this police sit-com, and rightfully so, but it truly is one of the best ensemble shows on TV right now. One word: Gina. (Hulu Plus)
• The Goldbergs (23 episodes in Season 1): I adore Gen Xers being in charge of television right now because nuggets like this ABC comedy are green-lit. Set in the late 80's, this above average family is parented by funny pros Jeff Garlin and Wendy McLendon-Covey. (Hulu Plus)
• Better Off Ted (26 episodes): Veridian Dynamics may be a an evil corporation, but it looks like a fun place to work. This workplace show combines the absurd with a dapper leading man. (Amazon Prime / Netflix)
• Freaks and Geeks (18 episodes): Before Paul Feig was making movies like Bridesmaids, The Heat, and the upcoming Peanuts, he created this teen comedy-drama set in 1980. One of the best shows to ever have such a short life. Include before-they-were-big-stars: Jason Segel, Seth Rogen, and James Franco. (Netflix)

Worth It, But It's A Big Commitment

• 30 Rock (138 episodes): I own a Tracy Morgan bobble head. Tina Fey is my spirit animal.  (Netflix)
• Veronica Mars (64 episodes): Kudos to all the Internet Marshmallows who insisted this Kristen Bell drama about a teen moonlighting as a private investigator would be great. Because it is. (Amazon Prime)
• Friday Night Lights (76 episodes): You guys. High school football in the South. Tami Taylor's hair. Riggins' abs. These are a few of my favorite things. (Amazon Prime / Netflix)
• Doctor Who (104 episodes in new Seasons 1-7): This British sci-fi drama is truly a huge commitment. The ninth doctor is a cheesy, but absolutely necessary prologue to tenth and eleventh doctors who will wreck you. But when you get to the episode "Blink" you will never turn back. Or blink. (Amazon Prime / Hulu Plus / Netflix only has 6 seasons)

Shows On My Own Summer Binge List:

• House of Cards  (Netflix)
• Moone Boy  (Hulu Plus)
• The Wire  (Amazon Prime)

What TV show do you recommend everyone should binge and why?

The Post About How You Take A Break

Of course, today was a day to remember the incredible price paid by men and women in service so that we might lounge at the lake and eat watermelon.

I hope you did all three - remembered, lounged, and ate.

Since I'm not actually a cook, I made the only burgers I could.

How did you celebrate a long weekend?

{image: Jamie}

The Post About Restless Small Group

Next week, I'm co-leading my first Highlands small group with my fantastic friend, Javacia Harris Bowser. 

We are spending six weeks tackling Restless by Jennie Allen.

Restless explores the fact that God has called each of us to do great things, and then helps us discover what that might mean for each of us. 

Jennie offers a simple process to identify the raw materials—the unique threads—we’ve been given by digging into five areas:

• Gifts
• Suffering
• Places
• People
• Passions

"We ache to be part of something great, and it makes us nervous at the same time. We were built for this, but we all fight hundreds of mixed motives and fears. Jesus said of us, "Whoever believes in Me...they will do even greater things than these." (John 14:12).....Our souls are restless until they rest in God. We were made for Him and He gave everything so that our souls could finally and forever rest in Him."

There are two ways you can be a part of this study.

1. Join us in person. 
Be a part of our IN REAL LIFE small group starting June 1. Just go to the Small Groups section of the Highlands website and search for "Restless." Space is limited.

2. Join us here on the blog. 
Each Monday, starting June 2, I'll be writing a discussion post and we'll chat through what we read the week before.

Read the first chapter of Restless here and clicking "Look Inside."

Have you ever felt restless?

The Post About The Popcast and Summer Movies

Previously...
I host a podcast with Knox McCoy called The Popcast. It is the Brad Pitt of podcasts: solid, dependable, hard-working and charmingly humorous. More specifically, The Popcast is a weekly argument / conversation about all things pop culture.

In this week's episode (#39), we throw a Summer Movie Extravaganza. We discuss the upcoming movies of the season, name the worst blockbusters, talk about actors who do their best work only in the hotter months, and we each pitch our own ideas for the perfect summer film.

Click to listen to Episode #39.

What's your favorite summer movie of all time?

The Post About Friday is for Cat Videos

Friday is for surely goodness and mercy.

And cat videos.

I LOVE CAT VIDEOS. It meets just enough of my need so I don't acquire an actual pet.

Here are five of my all-time favorites.











What's one of your favorite go-to videos to make the day brighter?

The Post About Picking Up Strange Habits

My parents are delightful.



They've taught me many things. My dad taught me how to mow the grass, although I refuse to do it. My mom taught me to sew, although I refuse to do it. They also taught me to be adorably codependent on those who can cut grass and sew.

Hopefully, they've also planted seeds of compassion and kindness and approaching the world with as much humor as I can stand.

Their real legacy though, is a few of the small quirky things they taught me that linger even now.

All medicines belong in the kitchen. I'm guessing this was because the worst headaches came at the prospect of cooking dinner for the one thousandth night in a row.

Sunday nights are for popcorn. We would always come home from church and cook popcorn on the stove and watch one of four channels on TV. Magic.

Wedding napkins are a collector's item. Those cocktail napkins embossed with a couple's names and the date are surely worth stacking up in a cabinet. Even if there are hundreds.

Candy should be eaten in an orderly fashion. Specifically by color and number. My mother assures me this isn't a medical diagnosis, just the right way to do things.

Do you have any unique habits you picked up from your family?

{images: Jamie}

The Post About How To Be Better at Instagram

It was recently reported that Instagram is doubling its base number of users every year. Currently, there are more than 200 million monthly active users. That's a lot of pictures of clouds.

Since there are new folks jumping on board every day, I thought I'd share some insight on how to be a better Instagrammer.

I don't necessarily consider myself an Instagram expert, but I have been an active user since March, 2011, and I have never used the Kelvin filter. Those are decent credentials.

Let's start with a list of things people don't particularly fancy on Instagram. This is based on HARD CORE scientific data collection on my Facebook, Instagram and Twitter:

Not Pictures:

• Laura Tucker Gallitz: Anything that's not a picture - like cute/inspirational/funny sayings. Have they not heard of Pinterest?
• Laura McClellan: Memes or something that is not your original content.
• Sonja Lange: My kids said "shout outs."
• Matt Cuthbert: Screen captures - esp. of whatever music someone's listening to.
• Jen Clapp: Typed quotes (aka not pictures.)
• Mariah: Screen shots of your Facebook status/note app.
• Jason Gausta: Videos.

Body Parts:

• Stephanie Parker: Feet.
• Jodie Dardeau: People with better bodies than me. No fair.
• Eleanor Mathis: Beach + knees pics. BORED.
• Michelle Holland: Breast feeding mothers or any pic where their breast or nipple is showing.
• Kelly Olsakovsky: It's worth a second mention. Feet.
• Laura Wilder: Injury pictures make me gag!
• Brandi: Wounds.
• Katy McCay: Injuries, low cut tops,

Creepy Animals

• Katie Earley: Bugs. Dead animals.
• Shawn Stinson: Pics of the snake/deer/squirrel/rabbit/turkey you killed today.
• Joy Sowell: Pictures of snakes!

Yourself

• Lance Moore: Selfies.
• Julie King: Selfies!
• Kari Lipp: Drunk selfies.
• Ed Cyzewski: I'm not sure whether I dislike selfies or foodstagram's more. Although foodstagrams look REALLY silly when people are actually taking them.
• Shawn Stinson: Selfies with worship song lyrics or bible verses as the caption.
• Vickie Aldridge: Selfies are a biggie. Unless they are artsy or creative, Otherwise I don't like the same face different day and location.
• Dawn Reiss: The "artistic" selfies, one after another.
• Tiffany Olsen: Selfies with duck face. Selfies from above. Selfies from below. Selfies in the car. Selfies with serious face. Selfies with a...

Bad Captions

• Kayla Perry: •• G I R L S typing like // T H I S •• in their captions. And having Bible verses as the caption of their selfies. No ma'am. Please stop.
• Kristin Graham: Ones that need an explanation, but are posted without a caption.
• Angela: Photos with a trillion hashtags.
• Maranda Cranford: #hashtagsthatarefullsentences. 
• Molly Gentry: Photos that have to have multiple sentences to explain why it's worthy to post. 

Poor Pictures

• Leigh Kramer: Unpretty things, like piles of laundry, scary insects, wounds, or screaming children. Not even a filter can fix that.
• Chris Callahan: Blurry/grainy/out of focus/dark/etc and not in an artistic way. Lazy gram is not appreciated.
• Katy McCay: Blurry, out of focus or just bad pics (it's ok to take 100 and use 1, why don't people know that?)
• Burrill Strong: Badly overexposed sunset/sunrise shots. If you have to tell me it was beautiful, your photo wasn’t good enough to post. Any photo that obviously had an Instagram filter applied. 
• Meredith Davis: Murky, gooey, super close up food shots using a flash...
• Amy Payne: Generic, unremarkable sky shots.

Miscellaneous Grumpiness

• Ryan Leigh Runyon: When someone's personal IG suddenly becomes a hard-sell business IG.
• Sarah Miller: Essential oils. "Hand lettering." Outfit of the day. Workout outfits. Screen shots of the music you're listening to. Coffee. When it's your friend's birthday so you post a collage of photos that is really a collage of your self and your friend just happens to be in the photos too.
• Jared Hollier: I don't like when people post half a dozen pics in a row.
• KJaco: Photos of black coffee (just because it's brewed in a different way doesn't mean it's cool), multiple photos in a row from the same event/same people, photos or screenshots of inspirational quotes.
• Rachel Callahan: Writing and only writing of any variety. Wounds, toes, bleeding animals (usually dead), nearly empty plates, extremely grainy anything, cleavage, mom jeans.

But let's be honest. This is America. You can do what you want. If you want to post a slightly blurry selfie of you with a bloody knee and no shoes holding a dead squirrel with a Bible verse above your head, then YOU DO IT.

But know this: folks probably won't click like. They will probably unfollow you. And you'll miss out on the "social" part of this social network.

So how do you increase the interacting? I took my five most liked pictures of all time and came to some conclusions.


First, it's a decent picture. Centered, good light, and it captures a moment most folks can relate to. Then I added a caption to juxtapose the fancy scene: Directing a wedding. Had to tell a groomsman: "If you smoke that joint in this processional, I will cut you. And by 'cut you,' I mean I will find a dull knife and stick it in your neck." YOU GUYS?!? 

Instagram is a great way to be a storyteller - not just in images. Plus, I asked my followers to share their thoughts. 


Photos of food are a deal breaker for many so I rarely post them. The key is to get an interesting shot that's well composed and sitting in fantastic light. Most restaurants are simply too dark, which is why most Instagram food fails happen. Eat outside or by a window during the day. Also, consider the menu item: does it sound like something people would love at just the thought of it? Like sweet tea fried chicken with white barbecue sauce with a side of fried pickles. Pick this combo up at Saw's Juke Joint in Birmingham.

Follow Helene Dujardin and let her inspire better food photos. If you are super serious about it, buy her book Plate to Pixel.


Remember what I said about storytelling? Instagram is a great way to invite people into your life. I want my feed to be a reflection of every part of who I am. Although this picture wasn't quite the quality I would have liked, the caption explains why it works: In January 2013, I named a green Lifesaver after a coworker and prayed for her every time I saw it in my purse. Today she got baptized and I ate the best piece of candy ever.

Be vulnerable. Don't just share the surface or the pretty parts of life. Be 3D, even in the 2D.


Outside is a common Instagram theme and I LOVE IT. I like flowers and sunsets and oceans and buildings and rain and clouds. But it's crucial we make these captures stand out. My best two tips are these:

• Consider angles. Don't be afraid to shoot from above, below, or from any sharp angle. I was hugging this tree to get this shot which looked ridiculous. I've laid prostrate in my driveway to get a good shot of a sneaker. Looking silly is not a good reason to miss a great photograph.
• Think like a square. Make every part of the IG square interesting. The sky in the above picture is as important as the tree. I filled the square rather than have any wasted space. I also cropped out anything that took away like power lines.

This photo combined cake pops and the Olympics. It was GUARANTEED to be a success. My tip is to always ask yourself before posting:

• Will anyone but me care about this?
• Am I okay with anyone on the internet seeing this?
• Have I posted any other types of photos but this one in the last few days? 
• Would this picture be better discussed in therapy?
• Is this a picture of feet or blood? 

Your answers will determine if I follow you.

What are your tips and tricks and complaints about Instagram?

Let's be friends on Instagram. Follow me @jamiesrabbits.

Note: Don't forget to join my new secret club and enter to win Amazon gift cards. Ends tomorrow!

The Post About What I Would Do If I Could

{image: Getty images}

If I could...


1.  I would snip my hair into a bob with bangs like Reese Witherspoon and my head size and face shape would not impact how awesome I look. 

2. I would sing like Joy Williams and write songs like Sara Bareilles. 


3. I would wear false eyelashes everyday and get manicures every week.


4. I would only eat cheez-its, hummus and drink gallons of sweet tea and still lose weight.


5. I would travel in my time machine to the 8th grade and convince myself not to wear anything that tapers. 

6. I would say "yes" to a marriage proposal from Taylor Kitsch, Killian Jones or an owner of a Chick-Fil-A.


7. I would carry the Alexander McQueen Pebbled Padlock Shopper Tote in Red and skip to brunch.


8. I would say things like "You're fly, sugar pie!" to the cashier at every store.


9. I would add on a screened in porch to my house and be featured in Southern Living magazine.


10. I would click "Last Minute Deals" on travelocity and then go wherever they said.

What would you do if you could?

Note: Don't forget to join my new secret club and enter to win Amazon gift cards!

The Post About Waiting Time

{image: She Reads Truth}

I've written 18 posts this month, but today I need you to write a post.

You see, I'm in this season of waiting.

I'm waiting for a long weekend. I'm waiting for the price of bacon to drop. I'm waiting for cooler temps. I'm waiting for my hair to grow. I'm waiting for the extra pounds to drop. I'm waiting for the job. I'm waiting for love.

Waiting.

It's not been a wasted season...not in the least. But a purposeful season of waiting can still be frustrating and lonely and difficult.

How have you navigated seasons of waiting in your life? 

Note: The image is from the current reading plan on Nehemiah from She Reads Truth. Fantastic daily study.

The Post About Dated Pop Culture and The Bachelorette

Previously...
I host a podcast with Knox McCoy called The Popcast. It is the Brad Pitt of podcasts: solid, dependable, hard-working and charmingly humorous. More specifically, The Popcast is a weekly argument / conversation about all things pop culture.

In this week's episode (#37), we discuss the idea of "datedness" within pop culture and how to best define what is dated versus what is simply a relic of pop culture's history. Also, we tackle Jay-Z and Solange, Amy Schumer, performing for dictators, and Johnnyswim.

Click to listen to Episode #37.

We also posted a very special bonus episode this week. We preview the 25 contestants of the newest season of The Bachelorette premiering Monday, May 19 on ABC.

Click to listen to Episode #Bachelorette.

What classic TV show do you think still holds up years later?

The Post About Threats at a Wedding

Today, I directed a wedding. 

A beautiful bride. A gorgeous venue. And a mashed potato bar with TWELVE toppings. 

However, leading an event like this isn't all flower arranging and cueing the violinist.

At one point, I had to tell a groomsman: "If you smoke that joint in this processional, I will cut you. And by 'cut you,' I mean I will find a dull knife and stick it in your neck."

What's your best wedding story?

The Post About Trading One Drug for Another

Six months ago, I beat one of my greatest demons.

It was freedom, you guys. I was no longer chained to my phone. I built real relationships with real people in real life. It was truly a magical season in my life.

And then this happened.

The problem with reading the Internet is stumbling upon reviews of apps that are so convincing that you buy whatever someone likes.

Threes was described by Touch Arcade as the "perfect mobile game." And they're not wrong.

Primary objective of this game? Slide blocks to combine factors of three.

Then, spend the time you would be washing clothes or getting your mail or parenting your children playing this game.

In the number of hours it took to achieve the above, I could have learned to speak fluent Mandarin.

Unfortunately, this is not a post about how I've overcome this...

How do you waste the most time on any given day?

Note: Don't forget to join my new secret club and enter to win Amazon gift cards!

The Post About Top Secret Rabbits Giveaway

I've posted on this site fifteen days in a row. I would love to tell you that my motivation is about the writing and the process and the community.

And that's mostly true.

However, when I said on Twitter I was going to write daily in May, several folks immediately scoffed my efforts. Their doubt was fair based on my past history, but this is America and I CAN SAY I'M GOING TO DO WHAT I WANT.

To celebrate this grand milestone of fifteen posts, I'm adding a special feature to the rabbit chasing.

Top Secret Rabbits are exclusive goodies that will arrive in your mailbox a few times a month. You'll be the first to know about my hot dates or if I ever try dates, the fruit. You'll get rabbit recommendations especially designed for you, plus a collection of the best rabbits I chased that month.

Click Here to Subscribe to the Top Secret List.

To thank you for joining the secret club, I'm hosting a little giveaway for two Amazon Gift Cards. One can buy you a bunch of stuff and one can buy you a little less. Just follow the instructions in the box below.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

I hope you win.

The Post About Muting People on Twitter

I'm celebrating 5 years on Twitter. That's one of the most committed relationships I've ever had with something that wasn't cheese. 

If you're not already tweeting, join us. It truly is my favorite thing on the Internet. Tied with cat videos.

And to get you started, I'll point you to my favorite go-to Beginner's Guide to Twitter by Michael Hyatt (@michaelhyatt).

For those of us already tweeting, the network rolled out a new feature this week: muting. Muting a user on Twitter means their tweets and retweets will no longer be visible in your home timeline.

The first question about muting is this:

@SarahMillerArt Fair question. For me, muting says "I really like you, but don't want to listen to you." Which is true for people IRL too.
— Jamie Golden (@JamiesRabbits) May 14, 2014

I'm southern and I'm always concerned with wrapping things "in pretty." An unfollow is prettier if it's just an anonymous mute. The real-life equivalent is hiding behind shelves of toilet paper to dodge people you know in Wal-Mart.

What other reasons might you mute someone? Why might you end up being muted? I asked Twitter and it answered. Here's a sample of the responses that are good lessons for Facebook too. Let's pay close attention.

@JamiesRabbits Over-tweeting. Complaining. Negativity. Over-critical.
— Ashley Beaudin (@ashleybeaudin) May 14, 2014

Note: Posting more than 10-15 times each day is a lot (not counting replies). Step away from your computersmartphonetablet and pluck your eyebrows. Or parent your children.

@JamiesRabbits annoying retweets, too many NSFW tweets
— Melissa (@MelFin80) May 14, 2014

@JamiesRabbits Bad hair.
— Tracey Reid (@dietcokeluvr) May 14, 2014

@JamiesRabbits to keep myself from sinning. ie Judging mercilessly.
— Rachel Callahan (@ObjectivityRach) May 14, 2014

Note: I mute folks who post pictures of their feet for the same reason. 

@JamiesRabbits I mute for too many negative tweets, retweets or political opinions unless I don't know them personally then I unfollow.
— Liz Harrison (@liz_harris0n) May 14, 2014

@JamiesRabbits permanently: their posts annoy me but I can’t unfollow them bc i know them IRL. temporarily: spoilers or twitter “chats”
— Laura McClellan (@laura_mcclellan) May 14, 2014

@JamiesRabbits I mute if someone does nothing but solicit or repost. Especially when they take over my feed with it.
— Redhot Writing Hood (@red_writinghood) May 14, 2014

@JamiesRabbits People who only tweet crap designed to motivate me to be a better anything.
— Joseph Kinnaird (@JWKinnaird) May 14, 2014

Note: Joseph cannot be motivated. 

@JamiesRabbits millions of hashtags, especially political. consistent argumentative trash talk. consistent jesus juking.there may be more
— Lauree Ashcom (@LaureeAshcom) May 14, 2014

Note: Even Jesus wouldn't Jesus Juke himself.

@JWKinnaird @JamiesRabbits Posts volatile things + combative when opposing views come up. Rude, racist, sexist, ablilist, threatening. . .
— Ben Hamaker (@HamakerBen) May 14, 2014

@JamiesRabbits Endless selfies. (Stop the vanity! You look the same every time! We get it, you like how you look!)
— Dawn Reiss (@dawn_o_mite) May 14, 2014

Note: What if I change my hair part? Can I keep posting then?

@JamiesRabbits mompreneurs
— Jan Moyer (@moyermama) May 14, 2014

@JamiesRabbits Too many complaints, they RT compliments with 'thx' added, too many baby pics, too many grammatical/spelling errors...
— Jaklyn (@iamjakz) May 14, 2014

Note: Be better than retweeting compliments.

@JamiesRabbits I tend to mute people who tweet rapid fire using hashtags that appear unintelligible/insider club.
— Mandy Shunnarah (@fixedbaroque) May 14, 2014

Note: Tweet using the hashtag #citbh and you'll be in my new secret club.

@JamiesRabbits I mute “twitter parties” - so obnoxious - defeats the purpose for the advertiser
— Stephanie  (@plainchicken) May 14, 2014

Note: Twitter parties are not better than real parties. Because dips.

@JamiesRabbits sports rivalries. I mute certain people during football season.
— Molly Gentry (@mollsabeth) May 14, 2014

Note: Roll Tide.

Follow me on Twitter: @jamiesrabbits. I promise to only be worthy of muting 5% of the time.

Why do you mute or unfollow someone on social media?

The Post About Hot Old Ladies Who Marry Their Cousins

One of my favorite books of the Bible is Genesis.

I like beginnings and guys who wrestle.

Whenever I read this book, some of the same questions always plague me:

1. What happened between the first and second verse of Chapter 1?
2. What did Eve think was happening while she was pregnant?
3. Who did Cain marry?
4. Who told Lamech he could have more than one wife?
5. What was Noah doing while he was naked that caused him to curse Ham for seeing it?
6. Was Ham mocked for having the name “Ham?”

Despite these questions, I've also learned some valuable lessons:

1. Women were considered very attractive into their 80's and later. This is why their husbands would pretend the women were their sisters. This prevented the "other" men who clearly couldn't control themselves around these hot mamas from killing the "man of the house." In reality, they weren't brother and sister - more like, half-brother and sister or cousins. That's so much better.

2. Babies were often named after something significant related to the circumstance of their birth. For example, Jacob (son of Isaac and Rebekah) has a name similar to the Hebrew word for "heel" because he was holding his twin brother's foot upon exiting the womb. If my parents had employed this method, I would have been named Melonheadia.

3. Stealing something from a family member never works out well. If you did attempt this, you needed to leave home immediately and only return when you could provide 100 sheep or a water well named in their honor as a peace offering. The exception to this rule was Rachel (wife to Jacob). She stole her father's household idols and hid them in her riding saddle. When he began the search, she apologized for not being able to rise from the camel because she was "in a woman way." It's good to know this special monthly arrival has been a go-to excuse for women for thousands of years. 

The most important lesson Genesis has taught me is that God is slow to anger when His children act like putzes. 

I'm a regular recipient of this mercy.

If you're a Bible reader, which stories are you drawn to the most?

The Post About Pricey Caps and Unflattering Gowns

Ahh... The smell of accomplishment. It's also the smell of paying your own bills and finding watermarked paper so your internships and workstudy jobs will seem more like...experience.

I love this time of year. It takes me back to my own college commencement. I was graduating from Emory University with a double major in Sociology and Women's Studies with a minor in African American Studies. (my conservative WASP-y Dad was super stoked.) 

Here are a couple of highlights of that weekend...

1. My commencement speaker was the Dalai Lama. Yes, that Dalai Lama. The best part was his holiness' speech lasted 9 minutes. Since the Georgia heat was bearing down on a couple thousand overdressed souls, he chose wisely.

2. Often, when you graduate you get a fake folder with no diploma inside (like the one you see to your left). But when you pay upwards of $35,000 a year in tuition, they're able to hire someone to coordinate it so you're handed your actual diploma. Unless you are Chris G., who was sitting next to me. He did the dance of going on stage, having his name called, hearing his family hoot and holler and then stopped for the memorial portrait. However, when he sat down, we simultaneously opened our folders. Mine had a shiny certificate that guaranteed me a difficult job search. His had a shiny letter that guaranteed him summer school since he had failed Chemistry.

What do you remember about graduating from college, high school, or kindergarten? 

Note: Kindergarten graduation is technically the dumbest event ever. Yeah, I said it.

{image: unknown, but overpriced photographer from Atlanta)

The Post About Mother's Day For Everyone

This is my mom. Adorable, right?

She hasn't changed a bit.

I thought I'd write this thoughtful and mom-high-fiving post about Mother's Day, but I've always felt a little uncomfortable with the holiday. It seems as if we often compete on social media for who has the best mom while those struggling with the day are forced into grieving silence.

Do I think my mom is better than yours? Absolutely. Is it okay for me to post an Instagram picture to prove it? Sure.

Note: These towels hanging from my mother's oven represent her two basic approaches to life.


However, I think it would be a mistake to ignore how painful this day may be for some. One of my favorite pieces on this topic was penned by Amy Young at The Messy Middle.

It's called The Wide Spectrum of Mothering:

To those who gave birth this year to their first child—we celebrate with you
To those who lost a child this year – we mourn with you
To those who are in the trenches with little ones every day and wear the badge of food
stains – we appreciate you
To those who experienced loss through miscarriage, failed adoptions, or running away—we
mourn with you
To those who walk the hard path of infertility, fraught with pokes, prods, tears, and
disappointment – we walk with you. Forgive us when we say foolish things. We don’t
mean to make this harder than it is
To those who are foster moms, mentor moms, and spiritual moms – we need you
To those who have warm and close relationships with your children – we celebrate with you
To those who have disappointment, heart ache, and distance with your children – we sit
with you
To those who lost their mothers this year – we grieve with you
To those who experienced abuse at the hands of your own mother – we acknowledge your
experience
To those who lived through driving tests, medical tests, and the overall testing of
motherhood – we are better for having you in our midst
To those who have aborted children - we remember them and you on this day
To those who are single and long to be married and mothering your own children - we mourn
that life has not turned out the way you longed for it to be
To those who step-parent - we walk with you on these complex paths
To those who envisioned lavishing love on grandchildren, yet that dream is not to be - we
grieve with you
To those who will have emptier nests in the upcoming year – we grieve and rejoice with you
To those who placed children up for adoption – we commend you for your selflessness and
remember how you hold that child in your heart
And to those who are pregnant with new life, both expected and surprising –we anticipate
with you
This Mother’s Day, we walk with you. 
Mothering is not for the faint of heart and we have real warriors in our midst. We remember you.

I'm thankful for all the warriors. Especially my own.

The Post About The Popcast Celebrity Politics

Previously...
I host a podcast with Knox McCoy called The Popcast. It is the Brad Pitt of podcasts: solid, dependable, hard-working and charmingly humorous. More specifically, The Popcast is a weekly argument / conversation about all things pop culture.

In this week's episode (#36), we talk about celebrities involved in politics; Rihanna; and our red, yellow, and green lights.

Highlights:

• Knox is blogging again: http://www.knoxmccoy.com
• Local Elections
• White House Correspondents Dinner
• Joel McHale
• Oliver North
• Veep
• Presidential Cabinets
• Vin Diesel
• Chyna
• Lady Gaga
• Hart of Dixie
• Jacqueline Mars
• Dolly Parton
• Sandra Bullock
• Benjamin Bratt
• Alicia Florrick
• Julia Sugarbaker
• Roseanne Barr
• Joss Whedon
• Katie Holmes
• Kevin Costner
• Brendan Fraser
• John Hartnett
• Matt Damon
• Eva Longoria vs. Scarlett Johansson
• Selfies
• Rihanna
• Emma Stone
• Andrew Garfield as Justin Timberlake
• Teen Pregnancy
• The Neighbors
• James Franco vs. Dave Franco
• Friends
• Seinfeld
• Naya Rivera vs. Lea Michele
• Monica Lewinsky
• Sally Field

Note: It's just an hour - we chase A LOT of rabbits. In a good way.

Click to listen.

Do you follow celebrities on Twitter, Instagram or Facebook? Who and why?

The Post About Being a Little League Aunt

This girl.

My youngest niece has had me wrapped around her finger since day one. We celebrate the anniversary of that day this week as she becomes the ever-important age of eleven.

She is kind, wickedly funny, and loves all things zombie.

The greatest proof of my affection for her is what I subject myself to in her honor. Namely, ball parks.

These wonderlands of dirt and bad lighting turn gentle folk into raging maniacs.

The Little League of America has a Parents' Handbook for Honoring the Game. As we all know, these documents don't write themselves without a need becoming apparent. It includes the following verbatim instructions for during a game:

• Don't yell instructions during the game. Let coaches coach.
• Cheer good plays by both teams.
• If an umpire makes a "bad" call against your team, Honor the Game -- be silent!
• If other parents yell at the umpires, gently remind them to Honor the Game.
• Don't do anything in the heat of the moment that you will regret after the game. Ask yourself, "Will this embarrass my child or the team?"
• Remember to have fun! Enjoy the game.

Has anyone ever been to a Little League game where these guidelines were followed?

I have not.

This includes my experiences sitting next to my Southern Baptist Church secretary mother who has probably had at least three minor coronary incidents while watching her grandchildren play outfield.

Nonetheless, I love that girl.

Bonus Rabbit: My niece's team finished in first place for the season, so I made cake pops to celebrate. The first comment by a player whose name ends in two "e's" was "Why are they baseballs?" Softballs are yellow. DID YOU KNOW THAT? 

{images: Jamie}

The Post About Instagram Commentary

Here are a few additional thoughts on some Instagram photos I recently posted. 

When spring hits, I become OBSESSED with being outside. And by "being" outside, I mean eating outside. There is no patio I won't frequent. I may actually be on your patio right now. The rest of outside can pretty much stick it. When I go to the park to eat my chicken nuggets at a picnic table and I see folks running, I think "Who hurt you runner person? Come eat a fudgsicle with me under this awning."

P.S. If you are ever in Birmingham, we will eat at Garage Cafe together. It will seal the deal on our friendship.

Another component of spring I fancy is the farmers' market. Although I wish there were farmers' markets that started at noon rather than closed at noon. I would spend all my allowance on berries. The unfortunate part is I don't cook. Not even a little, so I have to stick to things you can rinse off and eat immediately. Or jellies. Or jams. Or marmalades. Or preserves. By the way, what is the difference between those four? Is it a scam by farmers? Me thinks so.

These are my delightful friends, Haley and Jen. They're lounging in a movie theater in Atlanta where we went to see the Veronica Mars movie. I want to live in this AMC complex. Cupholders, free popcorn refills, and leather chairs that recline incrementally based on your emotional state. And your emotional state is all whimsy and twinkle stars because of these chairs.

I am my most irrational when I go to Target. On any given day, my list includes milk, eggs, and hairspray. I leave with milk, eggs, a picture frame, towels, post-it notes, nail polish, two workout DVDs and NOT HAIRSPRAY. 

These are my youngest nieces on a scenic hillside for our annual family Easter Egg hunt. In this moment of contemplation, they're plotting where on the "estate" they haven't looked since seven eggs are still missing. Although I was the one who hid the eggs, I am no assistance. I'm distracted by baby cows and the fact that I'm outside without a snack. Those eggs were found one week later when my Dad cut the grass. RIP Starburst jellybeans.

Chronologically, I'm Generation X, but my Y tendencies are strong. This is most noticeable when I'm driving. I can't seem to just be present in a car and be still when there's a down moment. When the light turns red or the traffic is stop and go like in the photo above, I immediately reach for my phone. BECAUSE GOD FORBID I NOT TAKE A PICTURE AND EDIT IT AND POST IT SO YOU KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING.

{images: Jamie}

The Post About What You Write and Read

So...I know you're startled. I've posted to this blog seven days in a row. This is more than I had posted since February.

I didn't realize how much I had missed it.

I've also missed reading your blogs. My Feedly reader actually fought back and deleted all my subscriptions. Yes, I assume it was a calculated move on its part as if it's a sentient being.

Help me start populating this technical frenemy again.

Do have a blog? What blogs do you consider must-read? 

Note: This will be a great crowd-sourced list, so don't hesitate to pimp yourself and others.

{image: Jamie}

The Post About My Failures At Feelings

When tragedy strikes, I may not be the person you want in your feelings bunker.

In the DISC personality profile, I'm a high "I." This means I:

• may be limited by being impulsive and disorganized and having lack of follow-through
• am described as convincing, magnetic, enthusiastic, and optimistic
• prioritize taking action, collaboration, and expressing enthusiasm

In the Enneagram profile I'm a high "7." My key motivations are:

• to maintain my freedom and happiness
• to avoid missing out on worthwhile experiences
• to keep myself excited and occupied
• to avoid and discharge pain

So when moments of sadness weigh heavy, my instinct is to treat it like a virus that must be contained.

I will nurse your sorrow with any number of medicines: laughter, optimism, carbs. Letting someone just sit with the heartache is difficult. I want to fix. I want to reframe. I want to be happy.

However, sometimes we need to wade in our grief. We need to let those we love leave the shore of bright sides and glasses half full and allow them to feel all the feelings.

Our job becomes being present and being willing. Willing to laugh, willing to be optimistic, and willing to eat cake - whatever's needed in being present.

There are so many examples in the book of Psalms of the writer starting out with raised fists and ending with open hands.

Chapter 13 is my favorite:

1 How long will you forget me, Lord? Forever? How long will you look the other way when I am in need? 2 How long must I be hiding daily anguish in my heart? How long shall my enemy have the upper hand? 3 Answer me, O Lord my God; give me light in my darkness lest I die. 4 Don’t let my enemies say, “We have conquered him!” Don’t let them gloat that I am down. 5 But I will always trust in you and in your mercy and shall rejoice in your salvation. 6 I will sing to the Lord because he has blessed me so richly.

I want to be the kind of friend who can sit beside someone as they point fingers in verses 1 through 4 and just let them point.

Then we can find our way to verses 5 and 6. Slowly, but surely.

How do you help folks through difficulty? 

{image: Jamie (depressing, huh?)}

The Post About Five Ways To Stay Young

I have three life goals:

1. The entire world to be at peace.

2. Every foster child to live in a healthy, happy home.

3. Look younger than my chronological age.

Rabbit Confession: My checkbook and calendar would tell you I'm spending my resources on one more than the others.  Spoiler: It does not involve intense talks in Crimea.

My bio on this blog says I'm thirty-something. The very act of using the term "thirty-something" means I'm not 100% comfortable with my age. I'm constantly self reflecting about getting older. Am I aging gracefully or am I kicking Father Time in the shins while plotting my escape?

It’s the shins.

But there's hope. Last week, a woman looking for me at an event I used to attend asked "Where's the little girl who talks so fast and bounces around?" 

Here are five ways I keep folks thinking I'm "little:"

1. Fitness: Please don’t get crazy. I’m not actually fit. But I do like to push my knees to the brink with rafting, skiing, and 4-square. Plus, it never hurts to schedule in daily dance breaks.

2. Drugstore Choices: Hair colors, face serums, and sparkly spackle are the best way to place the ravages of time in time out.

3. Pop Culture: I’m not afraid to love that which may not be age-appropriate. Phineas and Ferb, One Direction, and one ZacharyDavidAlexanderEfron.

4. Muffin Top: Carrying extra pounds leads to a higher risk of heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, stroke, and some cancers. However, those Cheez-its are a great over-the-counter collagen to fill out pesky hand wrinkles and brow lines. You may die 10 years earlier, but your coffin-side 16 x 20 portrait won’t need airbrushing.

5. Menu: A gourmet bowl of Froot Loops with a side of apple slices makes for a delightful meal. It’s all the better when served with a full-bodied grape Kool-Aid

What are your tips for keeping yourself young?